20 Dollars Fixes Everything
George was planning on going out with "the boys" when his wife told him that he wasn't leaving the house. George's Wife: "The last time you went out with your friends you got so drunk that you puked on your shirt." George: "But Honey, I promise that I won't drink a ......
Written on 11/11/2008

Thoughest Mouse?
Three male mice are sitting at a bar with 3 shots of tequila arguing about how tough they are. The first mouse says, "I'm so tough I break into the cupboard just to eat the rat poison." He slams down his tequila and looks at the second mouse. The second mouse ......
Written on 14/11/2008

What? Drunk? Again?
THINGS THAT ARE DIFFICULT TO SAY WHEN YOU'RE DRUNK: 1. Indubitably 2. Innovative 3. Preliminary 4. Proliferation 5. Cinnamon THINGS THAT ARE VERY DIFFICULT TO SAY WHEN YOU'RE DRUNK: 1. Specificity 2. British Constitution 3. Passive-aggressive disorder 4. Loquacious Transubstantiate THINGS THAT ARE DOWNRIGHT IMPOSSIBLE TO SAY WHEN YOU'RE ......
Written on 20/11/2008

Doctor Love
A beautiful, voluptuous woman goes to the gynecologist. The doctor takes one look at the woman and all of his professionalism goes out the window. He immediately asks her to undress. After she has disrobed, the doctor begins stroking her thigh. "Do you know what Im doing?" he asks. "Yes, " ......
Written on 20/11/2008

Code Word For Sex
A husband and wife decided they needed to use "code" to indicate that they wanted to have sex without letting their children in on it. They decided on the word Typewriter. One day the husband told his five year old daughter, "Go tell your mommy that daddy needs to type ......
Written on 28/11/2008